Word Count: 3,800
SPOILER: Don't read if you haven't seen (or plan to see) A Trip to the Dentist and/or Leave it to Beaver (finale) yet!
Notes: I've been wanting to write a script ever since the finale and now that it's FINALLY September, I might as well! This is basically comprised of various odds and ends I've been wondering about lately... The REAL premiere will go in a totally different direction, I'm sure! What's on the third tape? How Aaron seduced Lilly! One version I wrote was a little too heavy on the details and the other... not so much, so this hopefully strikes a balance between the two! Sorry for the apparent lack of plot... I really suck at this Nancy Drew thing! As for the lengthy exposition, it was either that or "Previously on Veronica Mars..." I've extended several scenes... And all of the commercials!
Open in school parking lot, gradual zoom on Veronica's vehicle. She has her head on the steering wheel, eyes closed with fatigue.
VOICEOVER: It's been one hell of a summer. The media's had a field day ever since two of the most prominent citizens in Neptune were arrested for murder and obstruction of justice, respectively. My father's still recuperating from the injuries he'd incurred while saving me from said homicidal psycho. All because I needed to find out what really happened the night my best friend was killed. They say that hindsight is 20/20. Would I have gone about it the same way, knowing what I know now? I'm not so sure. But at least Lilly's spirit can finally rest in peace.
There's a tap at her window.
WALLACE'S VOICE: You coming?
VOICEOVER: Thank god for Wallace. If he hadn't been there, I'd probably still be curled up in a ball somewhere.
Flashback to a bruised Veronica fondly greeting Wallace.
VERONICA: I was hoping it would be you.
WALLACE: Are you, are you okay? My mom filled me in with what went down. I came as soon as Darrell fell asleep. Girl, you look like you got run over by a truck.
VERONICA: That wasn't me, that was Aaron Echolls.
WALLACE: I can't believe that bastard tried to kill you.
VERONICA: It was the next logical step after Lilly.
WALLACE: That's not funny. You almost died, Veronica.
Her facade crumbles and she collapses against him.
VERONICA: Oh, Wallace. I was so scared. And, and my father...
WALLACE: Shh, shh. Your daddy's doing just fine. It's okay to act human sometimes, you know.
VERONICA: To be human is to err.
WALLACE: Well you can't be divine, either. Too much of a grudge-holder for that.
They both chuckle lightly.
WALLACE: I've gotta get back home... can't leave the little bro unsupervised. But if I didn't, I'd be sleeping right here on your couch.
VERONICA: Don't worry about me, I'll be fine.
He leaves and she turns on the television. Another knock sounds. She opens it bemusedly.
VERONICA: Did you forget something, Wall...
She does a double-take.
He stumbles inside, obviously drunk.
LOGAN: Thought you were expecting me.
VERONICA: What are you talking about?
LOGAN: Your little posse of flying monkeys paid me a visit and told me to see you.
He flops down on the sofa.
LOGAN: Well, not so much told as carjacked me. Hey, what's on?
VERONICA: I had nothing to do with that, Logan. You have to believe me.
LOGAN: Oh, the way you believed me?
She turns away, guilt-stricken.
LOGAN: And the truth comes out. I don't want to be here anymore than you apparently do but I'm rather attached to the X-Terra so let's get this over with, shall we? What was so important that your henchmen tracked me down all the way to Coronado, huh?
VERONICA: You were in Coronado?
He starts to hum the entire Jeopardy theme song.
LOGAN: Dum, da dum dum, dum dum dum. Time's up.
VERONICA: I found your note.
LOGAN: Ah, that explains the change of heart. So pray tell, where was it?
VERONICA: In Lilly's air vent. I also found out... who really killed her.
LOGAN: You mean, it wasn't me after all? Well, there goes THAT theory. How about OJ Simpson? Scott Peterson? Robert Blake?
VERONICA: Logan, it was your father.
Logan is still staring at Veronica, completely flummoxed.
LOGAN: No, you're wrong. That doesn't make any sense.
VERONICA: Logan... I've got proof.
He leaps up.
LOGAN: So, where is it?
VERONICA: Logan, they were... having an affair.
He clutches his head in anguish.
LOGAN: No, that can't be. They wouldn't do that to me. No, no, no!
He paces around, frantic.
LOGAN: Where's the proof?
VERONICA: Logan, I don't think...
LOGAN: I want to see it.
She reluctantly pulls a tape out of her bag.
VERONICA: Fine, use my room. I'll be waiting out here.
Cut to Veronica hesitantly approaching the door, some time later.
She enters to find him slumped on the floor.
He turns the set off by remote, clearly dazed.
LOGAN: Right under my nose. It was happening the whole time, and I was just too blind to see it.
VERONICA: You couldn't have known.
LOGAN: How could they have betrayed me like that?
She rushes over to him.
VERONICA: I think it happened the last time you and Lilly broke up. Here, I've got...
LOGAN: No more. I've watched enough incriminating evidence for one day.
VERONICA: Yeah, okay.
LOGAN: So what now? My dad gets some big-shot lawyers, stands a trial, pays the fine...
She gasps aloud.
VERONICA: Wait, Logan. I forgot to tell you. He's been hit by a car.
He appears stunned.
VERONICA: Right now, he's in critical condition.
There's an awkward pause.
LOGAN: Good. It's what he deserves.
VERONICA: Logan, he's your father.
LOGAN: Any more surprises I should know about?
She takes a moment to consider.
VERONICA: No, I don't think so.
LOGAN: You mean, none you can remember right now.
He rises and brushes himself off.
LOGAN: Okay, then. I'm just going to collect my trusty SUV now.
VERONICA: And then what?
LOGAN: And then I'm leaving town.
VERONICA: No, you can't do that.
LOGAN: I can and I will.
He turns to her.
LOGAN: Come with me.
LOGAN: We can go anywhere you want, as long as it's not here.
VERONICA: Logan, I can't do that.
He rakes his hair, frustrated.
LOGAN: Why not?
VERONICA: Because... my father's in ICU.
He gazes at her in shock.
LOGAN: Oh my god, Veronica. What happened?
VERONICA: Nothing, he...
LOGAN: Quit lying, you've been hurt. I was being too self-centered to see it before. Who did this to you?
His jaw drops.
LOGAN: It was him, wasn't it?
LOGAN: I should have known.
LOGAN: It's my fault, really.
VERONICA: How can you say something like that?
LOGAN: Why not? I destroy everything I touch.
She looks at him in horror.
LOGAN: Now I understand. Rule number one: never go on a trip with potential murderers.
VERONICA: Logan, it's not like that.
LOGAN: Sure it is. I'm like a virus.
VERONICA: Logan, you can't go.
LOGAN: I have to. Before the damage gets worse. I can't watch that happen to you. Stay away from me, Veronica. If you know what's good for you.
He slams the door shut and she falls against it, crying. The flashback fades away as Wallace pounds the roof of her car impatiently.
WALLACE: Any day now.
She gets out and they head inside.
VERONICA: Yeah, yeah.
WALLACE: Ready for another exciting year as seniors?
WALLACE. Undefeated b-ball season, prom, graduation...
VERONICA: College applications, SATs...
WALLACE: Ugh, you just had to bring that up. Thanks for reminding me.
VERONICA: Any time, champ.
He halts in his tracks.
WALLACE: Well, well. Look who's back. If it isn't the prodigal son himself.
Cut to Logan getting out of his car. He sees Veronica and they both freeze.
Veronica is busy organizing her locker.
MEG'S VOICE: Veronica Mars, fabulous as usual!
VERONICA: Why, Meg... I do declare!
They exchange comical air-kisses and giggle.
VERONICA: Love the tan. Where's Duncan?
MEG: Oh, he and I broke up.
VERONICA: Sorry, didn't know.
MEG: Don't be. I'm seeing someone else now. We were tutoring underprivileged children in Africa.
VERONICA: A card-carrying Greenpeace member, huh?
MEG: Of course! Say, I might have seen Duncan over by the quad. I have to admit we were fated to be short-lived anyways. Can't say I went into it with my eyes closed. Deep down, he'll always have you up on a pedestal.
Veronica doesn't know how to react.
MEG: Oops, we're going to be late. Toodles!
They run off in separate directions. Cut to Veronica and Wallace holding lunchtrays. She scans the pavilion as they sit down. Finally, she sees Logan alone at a table. Several fawning girls close in on him.
WALLACE: Mmm, mystery meat. How I have missed thee.
Logan gets up in disgust and throws away his food. The girls whisper furiously as he walks away.
VERONICA: I forgot my purse in Journalism.
WALLACE: Cut the crap, Veronica. Like you even own one. You think I haven't noticed how preoccupied you've been? I have eyes, you know.
WALLACE: All I'm saying is maybe the boy's got his reasons, okay? Just give him some space.
She calmly ignores him.
WALLACE: But no, you're Veronica Mars.
She grins proudly.
VERONICA: Damn straight!
VOICEOVER: Now if I were a teenage boy trying to hide out from the rest of the world, where would I go?
Cut to Veronica peering into a tinted window.
VOICEOVER: He's not in his car.
Cut to Veronica spying a kid at the urinal and quickly backing away.
VOICEOVER: He's not in the bathroom.
KID'S VOICE: Hey!
VOICEOVER: Maybe he decided to look up something instead.
Cut to Veronica at the library. She quickly spots Logan, who is intently focused on a computer and walks up to him.
LOGAN: Ah, Veronica Mars. Knew you'd show up here sooner or later.
VERONICA: I see you've been busy studying.
LOGAN: Greek Mythology, can't you tell?
VERONICA: At AlyssaMilano.com?
LOGAN: Well, she's certainly not a mortal like the rest of us.
VERONICA: Where were you?
LOGAN: Here she is as a modern-day Athena. Sleek, brave, defiant. And perky!
VERONICA: Why didn't you call?
LOGAN: This one's more Aphrodite-ish. Soft, generous, loving.
VERONICA: I missed you.
He gives up the charade and abruptly spins around.
LOGAN: How's your father?
VERONICA: He's doing better.
LOGAN: I'm glad to hear that.
VERONICA: And what about yours?
LOGAN: What about him? Don't know, don't care.
VERONICA: I thought you were gone, Logan. What made you come back?
LOGAN: The codicil.
She stares blankly at him.
LOGAN: My mother's will stipulated that I couldn't touch any of my inheritance until I'd gotten a diploma.
VERONICA: That's the only thing?
LOGAN: Yeah, that's it.
They both tense up.
LOGAN: I thought I told you to keep away from me, Veronica.
She rolls her eyes good-naturedly.
VERONICA: When do I ever listen to what you say?
He wears a stony mask.
She makes an unsteady retreat, crushed. He watches with a scowl as Duncan holds open the door for her.
DUNCAN: Hey, Veronica! How was your summer?
VOICEOVER: So it's not going to be a repeat of when my father went after the Kanes. Except this time it's MY actions that basically led to his father getting indicted.
VERONICA: Fine. And yours?
DUNCAN: Good, good. My mother insisted that we get the inevitable European tour out of the way, so that's why I haven't been around lately.
VOICEOVER: I heard Celeste entered a private facility in Geneva after having a complete mental breakdown.
DUNCAN: I would have called, but...
VERONICA: Those long-distance fees are a bitch.
DUNCAN: I like how you've let your hair grow out.
VOICEOVER: Ah, Duncan. You would prefer it that way.
The warning bell sounds, much to her relief.
VERONICA: Well, I've gotta get to class.
DUNCAN: See you later?
VERONICA: Yeah, sure.
She stares after him, lost in thought.
VOICEOVER: Quite the chatterbox now. Is it because he's stopped taking his meds? Or because I told him we're not actually related?
Cut to Veronica arriving home. Keith is cuddled with Alicia Fennel on the couch.
KEITH: How was school?
VERONICA: Same as ever.
KEITH: Is that good or bad?
VERONICA: Neither. It's just school.
ALICIA: That's what Wallace always says.
VERONICA: What's for dinner?
ALICIA: My specialty, Fettucine Alfredo.
Veronica turns to Keith.
VERONICA: Good thing Florence Nightingale here is still willing to baby you. If it were up to me we'd be having either macaroni, Rice-a-Roni or ramen.
ALICIA: Ah, but I've gotten rather attached to this particular patient.
The two of them kiss.
VERONICA: I'm going to be sick.
KEITH: Lucky for you we're not role-playing. Anymore.
VERONICA: Now I'm really going to be sick.
Both adults burst into laughter and the phone rings.
KEITH: I'm not...
Veronica promptly answers.
VERONICA: Mars Investigations, Veronica speaking.
Her eyes go wide.
VERONICA: Yes? I see. Thank you, I'll let him know.
She carefully hangs up.
KEITH: So, what's the big deal?
VERONICA: That was the hospital. Aaron Echolls just died.
Veronica slowly drives around a crowded marina.
VOICEOVER: Albacore Club, slip five. Here we are.
Logan is doing maintenance work with his shirt off. He stops as she gets out of the car.
VERONICA: A houseboat, Logan? Taking a leaf out of Abel Koontz's book?
He glares at her.
LOGAN: It's not a houseboat, it's a yacht.
VERONICA: Tomato, tomato. And you've been living out of it the whole summer? How very OC of you.
LOGAN: Yeah, like that one episode where Marissa accused Ryan of rape and escaped to Tahiti.
VERONICA: No, that was his brother and Seth.
He goggles at her.
LOGAN: You mean, that actually happened? And I just pulled it out of my ass! Maybe I should start tuning in again.
VERONICA: Ugh, never mind. Listen, I just wanted to see if you'd gotten the call yet.
LOGAN: What call?
She hastily backs away.
VERONICA: Oh, nothing really. You know what, I have to go catch an appointment.
LOGAN: Wow, Veronica. When did you become such a lousy liar? Guess you used up all of your A material while we were together.
VERONICA: No, I can't. Maybe Trina...
LOGAN: Trina doesn't even know I'm here. Now what is it?
VERONICA: Logan... your father just passed away.
He nods evenly.
LOGAN: Well. It's about time.
LOGAN: If you're expecting me to fall down weeping, don't hold your breath. He's burning in hell, where he belongs. Come on in. So tell me, what do you think of the place?
She sighs in resignation and follows him.
VERONICA: It's very nice. Whoa, is there a garage band hiding in here? Or did you somehow pick up the guitar, keyboard and drums all at once?
LOGAN: I got a little bored.
VERONICA: That I can see. You know, it's funny. I've never visited this part of Neptune before.
LOGAN: So that wasn't you cruising around here at night?
She rolls her eyes at him.
LOGAN: At any rate, it's not MY fault this is your very first visited here. If I recall correctly, you had your chance.
VERONICA: Hey, if this is about shooting the messenger...
LOGAN: Nope, that's my dad's job. Or was.
He grabs a bottle of liquor from the shelf.
LOGAN: So you and Duncan hooked up while I was gone, huh? How long did it take you guys, maybe two seconds after I was safely out of the picture?
VERONICA: It's not like that.
LOGAN: Gotcha, none of my business. Anyways, I need to take my daily skinny-dip now.
VERONICA: Ah, my cue to go.
LOGAN: That's right. Mush, mush!
He watches her leave with a look of wistful longing. Cut to the next day. Veronica idly examines a trophy case.
WEEVIL'S VOICE: If it isn't Veronica Mars. Miss me any?
VERONICA: Hey, thought you finally blew this popsicle stand!
WEEVIL: Well, I did. But then my grandmother said she'd never speak to me again if I settled for a GED, so here I am.
VERONICA: Thanks for intervening with Logan and all...
WEEVIL: You know he wasn't really going to jump, right?
VERONICA: Then what was he doing out there?
WEEVIL: Crazy drunk-ass fool somehow got it into his head that he was a tightrope walker forty stories up in the air. I saw him chuck away his trademark whiskey flask. And oh yeah, that ugly-ass necklace.
Her face alights with dawning recognition.
VERONICA: Thanks for telling me.
WEEVIL: No problem.
Cut to Veronica walking into the office, where Keith is busy sorting mail.
KEITH: Hey, did we get another check from Amelia DeLongpre?
VERONICA: No, why do you ask?
KEITH: There must have been a mistake at the bank. Either that, or we've really been saving up. Almost $50,000 unaccounted for here.
Veronica and Keith are making calls at the office.
VERONICA: I'll check around local bars, liquor stores, the usual. See if she's at her regular haunts.
KEITH: Why don't you leave that to me, Veronica? After all, I'm the one with the valid ID.
VERONICA: A legal one.
KEITH: I'm not going to ask. By the way, what would you say if I ran for sheriff again?
KEITH: I'm considering it. The PI thing has been fun and all, but I can't keep going back and forth between Mexico
VERONICA: Yeah, those donkey shows aren't worth it.
She shrugs innocently off his glare.
VERONICA: Or so I've heard. What about Lamb?
KEITH: My former deputy? You know he's been bungling it up since day one. Gotten nothing but complaints. So will you be my campaign manager?
She smiles gleefully.
VERONICA: Sure, let's kick his ass.
Cut to Veronica walking up to Wallace on the beach. He's busy directing his toy airplane.
VERONICA: Has anybody come into the Sac n' Pac and bought a lot of vodka?
WALLACE: Yeah, this one blonde lady. Absolut and Chex Mix, what a weird combination. Why?
VERONICA: The next time she comes in, I want you to find a way to plant this.
He grimaces as she holds up a tiny speck encased in plastic.
VERONICA: Don't worry. It's one of those new disposables. Breaks down after like, 24 hours.
WALLACE: Why are you so interested in this woman's drinking habits?
VERONICA: That's right, you never got a chance to meet her before. Let me introduce you to Lianne Mars. My mother.
Cut to Veronica at the Camelot motel. She's on the balcony, rapping at a window.
VERONICA: I know you're in here, mom.
The door opens.
LIANNE: Veronica? How'd you find me?
VERONICA: How else?
She gestures at several empty martini glasses.
VERONICA: Glad to know the rehab I splurged on you wasn't a total waste.
LIANNE: Oh no, that's not mine.
VERONICA: Whose is it then, Jake Kane's?
LIANNE: I haven't seen him in months, Veronica. But I'm telling you the truth. I've finally kicked the habit.
VERONICA: And it's raining lemon drops outside. Never mind, what you do no longer concerns me. I'm here because of the reward money you secretly deposited. So why even bother stealing it in the first place?
LIANNE: I just needed to borrow a little. You know, to help out an old friend.
A woman steps out of the kitchen.
VERONICA: Mrs. Echolls?
Veronica, Lianne and Lynn Echolls are gathered around the living room.
VERONICA: I can hardly recognize you.
LYNN: This is what happens when I'm away from my team of stylists. No hair, no makeup... and reduced to wearing clothes straight off the rack! Oh, and I got some... surgical procedures reversed. Let's face it, I haven't had feeling in my lips for years!
VERONICA: So have you been here the entire time?
LYNN: Of course not, I couldn't risk it. As soon as Aaron's death was confirmed, I was on the first plane out.
VERONICA: But... how? A kid I know captured some pretty convincing footage of your body hitting the water.
LYNN: That was a decoy. I'd kept around a prop from one of my movies just in case.
VERONICA: But why the elaborate scheme?
LYNN: You have no idea what my husband was capable of.
Veronica lets out a snort.
LYNN: Then again, perhaps you do. Now. And that's why.
Veronica finally breaks the silence.
VERONICA: Oh my god, Logan. You couldn't inform your own son? He went through hell thinking you were dead!
LYNN: I wanted to bring him with me, I really did. But I knew if I did that, his father would stop at nothing to track us down. And Logan would have hated being on the run. That's not his way, to hide when things get tough.
VERONICA: Well, you'll be happy to hear that he exhibited all five stages of grief. Denial, anger, depression, acceptance. I'm missing one, is it apathy? So anyways, now what's he supposed to do?
LYNN: Ever since I got back, I've been secretly checking up on him to make sure he's okay. But I just don't have the courage to drop yet another bombshell on my son. Maybe you could break it to him gently?
Cut to Veronica wandering around the shipyard with a flashlight. She bumps into Logan, who is wielding a baseball bat.
VERONICA: I'm unarmed!
LOGAN: So much for not stalking me, huh?
VERONICA: Nope, but I know who is. Don't worry, it's actually good news... for once. At least, I hope so.
LOGAN: I'll be the judge of that. How'd you get past the night guard?
VERONICA: I seduced him with my feminine wiles. Or a plate of snickerdoodles.
LOGAN: Wouldn't put it past you.
VERONICA: The power of my flirting or baking abilities?
LOGAN: Either. Both. I think you'd better step inside. It's a little... ah, nippy here.
She crosses her arms instinctively and follows him.
VERONICA: I tried calling your cell, but you weren't picking up. Glad to see that you're still doing that quote of the day thing. "To lose one parent may be regarded as a misfortune, to lose both looks like carelessness." Didn't know you were a fan of The Importance of Being Earnest!
She chuckles nervously.
LOGAN: It seemed apt.
She averts her eyes.
VERONICA: Uh, not anymore. Guess what, you were right all along! Your mother's still alive, Logan.
He drops his bat.
VERONICA: She was waiting for the right opportunity to tell you and now that...
LOGAN: How long has it been, almost a year? I've finally buried her memory and now she wants me to dig it back up?
VERONICA: Logan, she was scared.
LOGAN: She wasn't stuck with him. She wasn't hounded by hordes of rabid paparazzi.
VERONICA: Logan, she was trying to protect you.
LOGAN: No, what she did was abandon me. And fed me to the wolves. Vultures. Like everyone else.
Veronica looks away and spies a notebook on the shelf.
VERONICA: Hmm, what's this?
He tries to snatch it out of her hand.
"Fix You" by Coldplay starts up as she opens it and gasps.
It contains numerous sketches of her profile.
VERONICA: Wow, Logan. I... never knew you were artistically inclined.
He shrugs nonchalantly.
LOGAN: Well, there's a lot of things you don't know about me.
She continues to flip through it, mesmerized.
LOGAN: It took me like, three hours to finish the shading on your upper lip.
"Lights will guide you home"
VERONICA: Remember when you invited me on a date to Catalina?
"And ignite your bones"
LOGAN: And you stood me up because you thought I had drugged and raped you? Sorry, doesn't ring a bell.
"And I will try to fix you"
VERONICA: Let's go.
Fade to black as they silently gaze at each other.